Spare the rod, spoil the child.

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*如果自己錯了,這其實是最好的,因為自己學到了東西.
*如果自己對了,也很棒,因為幫助別人學到了東西.
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*態度溫和:避免使用情緒性及攻擊性字眼,多些尊重!多些尊重!
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衷心建議, 與別人說理辯論時, 請查字典, 文法書, 或和語言相關之參考書籍. 再來可參考英文書籍,新聞,雜誌,或英語為母語人士的用法

請不要常拿Google有多少例來辯證. 因為那牽扯到Mega-analysis和Database使用的嚴謹性. 首先要設定 sampling 的criteria來確認例子出處的品質及可靠度,再來用不是很簡單的統計學方法做統計,分析,最後做結論. 那通常是很專業的人在寫論文或報告時才會去做的,因為那很花時間與精力.

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Spare the rod, spoil the child.

台灣英語網1.0 » 週六 8月 22, 2015 6:01 pm

Spare the rod, spoil the child.不打不成器。

Nowadays,Education is doing a great part of life quality improving and society developing, how to educate the coming afterworld?
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Re: Spare the rod, spoil the child.

台灣英語網1.0 » 週六 8月 22, 2015 6:01 pm

This is a serious issue internationally.

Now we are emphasizing the concept of "Human Rights"
when it is being misunderstood and abused to begin with.

Teachers can no longer teach.
Parents can no longer discipline.

because our children are learing to abuse "human rights" like adults do.

they know that:
"teachers and parents can't hit me, can't tell me what to do."
"i can call police if my parents hit me."
"i can tell the authorities if my teacher hit me"


"they adults don't practice what they are teaching us themself, i have no idea to know if what they say is right, i have no example to learn from."

"i have my right."



now teachers go to school to just to "make some money"
students go to school for that "piece of paper".
not much teaching and learning involved.

since when we desided to do it like this?
we teach our children to compete like they are in a war.
we teach our children to step on someone else to get higher.
we teach our children to talk back to parents and teachers.
we teach our children how to make more and more money as if that is the ultimate goal of life.

yet, everyday we wonder why there are so many BAD news on TV.


we really have to re-think.

and start practicing what we preach.

:)
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Re: Spare the rod, spoil the child.

台灣英語網1.0 » 週六 8月 22, 2015 6:01 pm

Hey DTC, is this topic of human rights consider politics?
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Re: Spare the rod, spoil the child.

台灣英語網1.0 » 週六 8月 22, 2015 6:01 pm

No, it's not. As a matter of fact, I consider it a very good read.

As long as it's not off-topic -- away from "Spare the rod, spoil the child" -- it's ok and I allow it.
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Re: Spare the rod, spoil the child.

台灣英語網1.0 » 週六 8月 22, 2015 6:01 pm

I've got some sentiments concerning whether we should punish our children physically. I have only a child, a 10-year-old girl. In her very early childhood, I told myself I should educate and treat her in an open-minded and caring way. You know I hated to see people punish their kids physically, especially when there were not adequate reasons. But how did things go about my girl's discipline? Frankly speaking, that was not a very good experience. Up to now, I can recall that when she did wrong things in the early stage, I was almost always patient and caring to tell her it's wrong or immoral to do such things, hoping that she could correct her behavior without serious punishment, even in a verbal form. But as you can guess it did not work. She would repeat the same error till I punished her seriously, especially physically.

It's true when people, including kids, do bad things, there are some drives inside them, which tempt or drive them to do so. So when our kids make behavior mistakes, if we don't try to get effective ways to stop them doing so, the drive to do bad things would take over their minds, and they are very likely to commit such errors again and again. According to my personal experience, yeah, the rod is the most effective tool to halt these behavior errors. It sounds a little sad but it's really my sentiment. Roughly two years ago, I was determined to use the rod whenever my daughter makes a major behavior error which I have seriously told her not to do. This has proved to be a good way to not only stop her wrong behavior but also prevent her from doing again.

Though the rod seems indispensable in educating or disciplining our kids at home, we should never forget that love, respect, and communication always play more important roles than the rod in treating and educating our kids. Does it sound contradictory? Maybe it is or maybe not. What is more essential is that we should manage to get a point where we can encourage or correct our kids with love or whatever positive attitudes, while we are still able to restrain them by reasonable physical punishment. How can we get to that point? A practical method is to set a rule and a clear boundary for a certain thing. We sure have to explain that boundary to them beforehand. If they act or behave within the boundary, they can feel relatively free to do things they like. In case they go beyond the boundary intentionally, we are supposed to discipline our kids without hesitation as the regulation has shown already. Still, we have to explain to our kids why we want to discipline them before we decide to use the rod.

Finally, I'd like to emphasize some things here.
*It's better that we consider physical punishment the last resort to solve problems. Adverse effects would be inevitably caused by punishment. There are many actions we can take to prevent kids' behavior deviation before we really have to impose punishment on our kids. So use the rod as less as we can though it's effective.
*For every different kid, the extent of punishment needed is different individually. The more good-natured they are, the less the punishment we have to use.
*Love, respect, and communication can never be replaced by punishment because they are the core attitudes of education.
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Re: Spare the rod, spoil the child.

台灣英語網1.0 » 週六 8月 22, 2015 6:01 pm

Yes, I think education is quite important here.Cuz the one who is well-educated would be easily realize what is "right",what is "wrong". Regardless of whether the young people like learning or not, they need to get good education. We can use rod to punish the one who is lazy to study.

In mainland,China, people should gain a bachelor degree at least. And I think no matter how many degrees a person have gained,he/she should respect for others'choice of life styles. Also "study" doesn't mean study knowledge only,meanwhile,"study daily life, study to be a good charater person."which is another important part to a person.
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Re: Spare the rod, spoil the child.

台灣英語網1.0 » 週六 8月 22, 2015 6:01 pm

Very good post, ruke0128..

you make it really easy to understand that physical punishment cannot be the way to educate our children when we know that love (including respect and communication) is the only thing that works.


"Spare the rod, spoil the child"

the word "rod" being used here has a broad meaning.
as well as the Chinese translation of it..

不"打"不成器

the word "hit" being used here also has a broad meaning.

Rod and 打 should not be taken literally as physical and/or verbal punishment .
we should understand that it actually means "the Education" or "to Educate"

If we don't educate them, they will be spoiled.


but what if the "rod holders" themselves have the EXACT misbehavior as the ones who are being "corrected"?

before we execute the "Spare the rod, spoil the child"
we have to execute the" 要刮別人的鬍子前,先把自己的刮乾淨".

which means:
"Before we bring out the rod, make sure we ourselves are not the spoiled ones"


Love
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Re: Spare the rod, spoil the child.

台灣英語網1.0 » 週六 8月 22, 2015 6:01 pm

引文: Rod and 打 should not be taken literally as physical and/or verbal punishment .
we should understand that it actually means "the Education" or "to Educate"

I didn't know this, and I still don't understand why "rod" can denote "eduction". I can nevertheless take your point.
Thanks for your comments.
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Re: Spare the rod, spoil the child.

台灣英語網1.0 » 週六 8月 22, 2015 6:02 pm

引文: but what if the "rod holders" themselves have the EXACT misbehavior as the ones who are being "corrected"?

This is a very good point. A lot of times parents simply forget they may be the source of the problem. Years ago, I read an article on a local newspaper. It mentioned a research conducted toward children's behavioral problems and stated that “kids tend to kick objects around them when their parents are constantly in quarrel.” At that time, I lived with my uncle's family, and yes, he and his wife fought a lot. Soon after I finished reading that article, we headed out. On our way down the stairway, my little cousin, at age 7 (I guess:p) kicked his downstairs neighbor's big metal bucket served as a paper-money burning device.

“To Hit or not to hit, that is the question,” and I don't have the answer for that. For me, I only know that I don't appreciate what my junior high school teacher did to me. She is the “rod” believer and I still hold the resentment toward her. Really, I'd rather have a “less normal” life than constantly relive the nightmare in my dreams for the rest of my life.
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Re: Spare the rod, spoil the child.

台灣英語網1.0 » 週六 8月 22, 2015 6:02 pm

We can see what the result is from this generation of kids, of what happens when we spared the rod. For me, I don't need to discuss the issue any further.
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